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Moving between the North and South Towers just hasn't been the same since that unfortunate Zip-Line accident. Sure, the Zip-Line was a faster way of coming and going between the two buildings, but when Jerry Price absent-mindedly closed the North Tower entrance portal...I don't even want to think about what happened. Oh, the humanity! Anyway, the lawsuit was finally settled by a consent decree between the Office and OSHA: Only files and GS-11s may be sent across on the Zip-Line, nothing else. Which only makes sense, I mean after all, safety first! Yes, I know, I've already written an article in the Tower Bell about painting, but I re-read it (and you can too right here ) and I discovered 3 important things about the article.
This affords me the opportunity to write about interior painting, which is coincidentally, what my wife has decreed that I will do this weekend. Interior painting is very similar to exterior painting but far less wasp and spider intensive. Interior painting is actually the true middle class college scholarship program; everyone I knew in college who wasn't living on someone else's dime, whether it was rich parents or a gumm'nt grant, made money with a paint brush (the big, wide ones, not the little skinny ones). During college, "painting" could be more accurately described as "laminating"; preparation simply took too much time - gotta study, you know. So all spiders, dust, cobwebs, Legos, etc., became "textural statements" on the wall. What we're going to do is unlearn college painting. Before we do anything, we have to buy stuff. As you know, all home projects are nothing more than excuses to buy more tools. First, if you can swing it: a power roller. These things are great! Don't wimp out & buy the cheapo battery powered roller. Dave Shallant didn't like it; you won't either. Wait for the Wagner Power Roller to go on sale for about $70 and snatch one up. Regular price is about $100. These things will let you knock out a room in no time, and they come with lots of attachments to facilitate clean-up. I got one and I'll never go back to the roll-'n-dip again. Next, you'll want an assortment of those little paint pads. These things work amazingly well and they're cheap. Be sure one of the pads you get is the one with the little wheels on one edge. This allows you to ride along the edge of windows, doors, ceilings, and base molding, painting perfect razor-sharp lines effortlessly. Sure beats masking tape. But notice this requires that you paint that inside corner between wall and molding or ceiling before you use the pad. Those tiny angled paint pads are great for window muntons & other hard to paint areas. If you plan on doing a fair amount of painting, get some good tarps. Those $1 ultra-thin plastic things are OK for touch-up painting and one-time use, but be aware: they will tear, and the hole will be right where a big blob of paint will fall 5 minutes in the future. At the other end of the spectrum are canvas tarps. At $25 each, use these only if you're planning on going into the business. Finally, there are the new plastic-laminated-to-spun-bond-fabric tarps. These are a bit tougher than the plastic, they won't slip as easily as plastic, and you can re-use them a few times. Most importantly, they're only $3-$4 each. Get some of these. As for procedure, it's pretty much like college painting with one big difference: Preparation. Wash the woodwork with a houshold cleaner and then wipe the soap residue off with a clean rag which is rinsed out often. Clean out cobwebs and shoo the spiders away. Wash walls if necessary. Patch divots and holes in walls with a lightweight spackling. Lightweight spackling doesn't shrink as it dries, so it doesn't require two applications, and it can be painted over almost immediately. Lightly sand glossy paint. If done correctly, this preparation should take you longer than the actual painting, but the paint job will last many years instead of many months. First, paint the ceiling with a roller. Roll out the paint in a "W" pattern, then turn about 90 degrees and roll out another "W" pattern over the first. This will ensure complete coverage and a smooth wall or ceiling. After that, paint the inside corner around the perimeter of the ceiling with a brush. Paint about 2 inches or so onto the wall. If you are using latex paint, use a brush with synthetic bristles, if you're using oil based paint, use a natural bristle brush. When you're done with that, roll out the walls. Then paint the woodwork around doors, windows, and base molding. Usually, you will use a semi-gloss paint on woodwork, and you can paint onto the wall an inch or two. Now, using your nifty little paint pad with the wheels on it, run it around the walls, doors, ceiling, and base molding (be sure to put some paint on the pad). If your base molding is that clamshell stuff that I see everywhere around here, the little wheels won't ride on the thin edge. You'll need an edger. An edger looks like a piece of Venetian blind about a foot long with a handle in the middle. Put the edger on the thin edge of the clamshell molding and run the wheels of the paint pad along the edger. It works perfectly. An edger is also useful in holding back carpet when painting the base molding. But when painting base molding right up against a hardwood floor, I still use masking tape. You know, that Zip-Line looks like it might be a lot of fun. Maybe if I tried it just this once. Boy! The people below look like ants! Isn't that Jerry over in North Tower? "Hey, Jerry! ...Wait, don't shut the....Oh no!…....Jerry!"
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